Create and Cultivate: Advice From Women Who Do
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ADVICE FROM WOMEN WHO DOA few days ago I attended a celebration. Create and Cultivate, my new favorite movement and source of professional motivation, honored 100 women who have set benchmarks in their fields. Surrounded by a massive balloon installment, champagne toasts, flashing cameras and the hum of music muddled with chatter, hundreds gathered at The Platform in Culver City.
I was asked to assist styling 50 entrepreneurs, artists, philanthropists and tastemakers a few months back for a photoshoot accompanying the stories they have to tell. Spending two days in the company of women driven by their inspiration is a rare experience in a world where most of us act under influence of years of imposed expectations and pressures of modern time. I took this opportunity to ask advice of these women so that I and others in the infancy of their aspirations might be encouraged to be more bold. Here is a condensed version of things I was told.
Do the work.
If you don’t work your ass off, someone else will. In fact, your peers might be working at this very moment. Don’t be alarmed— this doesn’t mean you should compete with anyone; there is room for all of us! But the belief that your brilliant idea or talent alone will be enough to support your dream is crippling. Lay a brick every day; there are no shortcuts to building an empire. There will be times it seems that you encounter road block after road block, and it might make you question whether or not you’re even on the right road anymore. But don’t allow anything to deter you from doing your work. Luxuriate in the time it takes to pick up momentum— doing what you love is rewarding regardless of external validation. And when you are called upon, you will be prepared.
Equalize every room you enter.
Put no one, not a single soul, on a pedestal; when you do, you create a false internal caste system in which some people are better than others. When you categorize other people, you're categorizing yourself too, meaning you’ve given them the power to determine your self-worth. When you limit yourself and others to roles that don’t actually exist, it affects your relationship to what’s happening right in front of you and imposes feelings of nervousness, jealousy, et al. But we are all just people co-existing with other people, so when you find yourself in the company of someone you admire, celebrate! Don’t become small. Don’t dismiss yourself before they have the chance to accept you.
Be open-minded.
Inspiration won’t find you if you are sitting at a desk and waiting for it. Being mentally stimulated to do or feel something is the outcome of activity. Entertain your interests with your eyes open. You cannot predict how your ideas will materialize. For example, Steve Jobs audited a calligraphy class as a college dropout, and in turn discovered typography. Everything he learned influenced his incomparable Mac interface, upping the industry standard of usability in PCs. He stated, “Of course it was impossible to connect the dots looking forward when I was in college. But it was very, very clear looking backwards ten years later.” So, as the saying goes, don’t work when you’re inspired. Work to be inspired.
Collaborate!
Learn how to play well with others. Having someone to be devil’s advocate when you make important decisions is invaluable. Having someone to back you up when you’re challenged is empowering. Having someone who offers yang to your yin makes you well-rounded. Think about it; if you find yourself butting heads with someone on your team who sees differently than you do, they are probably also bringing a unique skill set to the table, and those skills might pick up slack where you struggle. Additionally, rid yourself the belief that it is never a good idea to collaborate with a person who you know well. Working with someone who “gets you” could lead to an intuitive workflow and a holistic, unified approach to a task. When your mission is strong, you will find common ground and relent when conflict is trivial. And if you respect one another, you will be able to know when something isn’t working, communicate and amicably complete the process without bad blood.
Be authentic.
The noise around you is resounding and you are involuntarily bombarded by images of others’ successes. It might seem that everyone is more boisterous and further along than you are. There are boundless opportunities to compare yourself to others and surrender to doubt. Don’t give in. Judging from the pace of things, anonymity isn’t coming back in style any time soon, so embrace the opportunity to be exactly who you are. Individuality is the key to discovering what isn’t already being represented. You might be able to reach a few people who are moved by what you uniquely have to offer, or you could become more sought after than you imagined. Either way, you win and compromise nothing.
Never lose sight of what you love.
Whether you feel lost or haven’t yet realized what it is you want to do in the first place, think about the things that make you happiest. Ask yourself, “what do I love?” because your answer will give you information. Your relationship to the things you love is what makes what you have to offer uniquely you! If you feel turned around, remind yourself of the reasons you do what you do. If you’re figuring it out, be active in the things you enjoy doing. Love rarely translates to a crystal clear vocation. But in time you will realize that something you care about is being underutilized, misrepresented, or there are holes in a market entirely. Consider it your responsibly to the community at large to do what you love and love what you do.
Be strong.
Expect some blows. As a creator, you might face opposing viewpoints, copycats, financial burden and unfriendly competition. As a woman, you might experience a culmination of stereotypes, challenges to your value as an entity and overall discrimination. Today’s climate is discouraging, but you are more resilient than you can imagine. Accept the occasional discomfort as growth, and remember that evolution of the community begins with evolution of yourself.
Written by Julia Barna
